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Thursday, October 20, 2005

The reverie of a bored employee...

I've got a clean desk!!!

Not just 'paper stacked', 'pens in pen cup', 'keys/smokes/lighter/wallet in bag' clean, but 'Mother approved' clean! You see, today saw the arrival of my long awaited, OSH approved, posture helping "Dell D/View" - a stand that holds a laptop/dockingstation and rises in much the manner of a Z shape, to keep the laptop screen at a viewing height approved by Occupational Safety and Health, to ensure good posture. This opened up a wealth of empty desk space immediately between my monitor and keyboard, which then prompted me to create empty desk space everywhere else, which required me to create empty drawer space- all quite a feat to pull off!
Anyway, the work was done, and the results speak for themselves. iPod, Cellphone, Moisturisers, eyedrops, photoframe and stationery are all in easy to reach, yet aesthetically appealing places, there is plenty of room for my handbag to sit on my desk and not clutter things up, and now it does truly look like I work in a paperless office after lovingly organising any documentation and scrap paper away in my desk drawers.
Now it's 4:05pm, and my desk is all clean. There are 25 minutes until I finish work, and I am completely and utterly confused as to what I am supposed to do now. Do I start another pile of work, get totally engrossed`in what I'm doing, look at the clock, discover it's 5pm and I've gone half an hour over my parking meter allowance, then freak out and sprint downstairs, to find a ticket waving menacingly from the confines of my windscreen wiper? Do I sit here absentmindedly staring at my computer clock willing the minute hand to move faster so I can go?

Maybe I can set my cellphone alarm for 4.25pm, and fall into a daydream, where I imagine I can choose any two particular super powers to better myself and those around me. I would choose the ability to pull any required amount of money from any pocket or purse in my posession, and the Jedi Mind Power. "You do not require any money for the purchase of this Gucci dress". "You do not need to check my suitcase for over-allowance duty free". "You do not require money for this gasoline purchase".

Although that could negate the need for the bottomless money pit. OOH ok, then, instead of Jedi Mind Powers, I'll take the healing powers. My back/wrists/legs/head are all in alternating states of pain, and have been for quite some time. With one wave of my hand, all the pain is gone, and this works on anyone I choose. OOOH OOOOH And the opposite works aswell, if I wish it to. I can inflict untold amounts of pain (of course relative according to the amount of pain I have taken away from people) on those I wish.

Oh look at that - 4.30pm already.

Ciao! :)